Grim drags his hand down his beard and exhales through his teeth, a sound like an irritated hiss. “You’re gambling with our lives, captain.”
Sable doesn’t look at him. He rolls the map back up again and thrusts it into its leathered cover.
“It’s not a gamble,” he says. “It’s our course. We must continue to follow the Glim.”
“A course into nothing,” Grim snaps, stepping closer to the railing and pointing out at the sea ahead. “We don’t know what lies beyond.”
Sable turns then, finally, his gaze sharp as it lands on his first mate. “No,” he murmurs through gritted teeth. “But what can beworse than the fate that awaits us should we not continue. If we can place our trust in the sea, it will lead us to the Sea of the First Song. And based on its name, I assume it will somehow help Eryse with her song.”
His words fall heavily between them. My gaze lands on Lark, who is still holding the wheel, staring ahead and pretending not to hear their words, when I know he does. They never exclude him. Not during the maelstrom, not now, forming into him the pirate he must be to survive.
Grim's jaw tightens, then he shakes his head. “You’re leading us into the abyss.”
Sable steps closer, close enough that Grim has to tilt his head back to meet his gaze. “ I’d rather die there,” he says quietly, “than rot in the Sea of Bones like the others.”
His words are the last drop in a barrel already filled to the brim, causing it to finally overflow.
Grim curls his hands into a fist at his side. “You don’t get to decide that alone.”
I hold my breath. I know that challenging the captain’s decision means mutiny, and what it does to a crew.
“I do,” Sable replies, his voice calm and controlled. “That’s the curse of being captain. Unless you want to challenge me for the spot?”
Silence. I glance between them, unsure what to do. I feel like an outsider again, watching a conversation I shouldn’t be hearing.
Grim steps back, lips pressed into a thin line, and turns away without another word. The argument dies there, unresolved. I exhale the breath I’ve been holding and watch Sable take over the helm again.
“Captain,” Lark murmurs to excuse himself, then slips away towards the nearest rigging to accompany his father in the Crow’s Nest.
I don’t dare to speak as the Noctis keeps dashing through the water. He has made the decision, for all of us. There’s nothing to do about it.
I am about to leave, my back already turned away, when he speaks, causing me to freeze on the spot.
“You spoke to my shadow,” he says in a sharp tone. It’s not an accusation, but it’s not a question either.
I lift my gaze, but do not turn towards him yet, even though I know that the confrontation is unavoidable and needed.
“I had a feeling,” he continues, quieter now. “And I don’t like being left in the dark.”
For a heartbeat, I consider deflecting. Lying, even. Pretending I don’t know what he’s talking about. I don’t want to make him say it a second time, to drag him through that pain again. But I know it has to be done, that this conversation must happen between us, not just between me and his shadow.
“Yes,” I say. “I did.”
He doesn’t meet my gaze. He stares ahead, his hands gripping the wheel with such force that his knuckles turn white.
“What did he tell you?”
“That returning to you feels like dying,” I say finally. “That staying away hurts less than coming back.”
Sable’s breath leaves him slowly, his lashes fanning against his cheek for a moment, before he finally turns towards me.
“And?” he asks.
“And that he doesn’t believe you can be saved.”
His jaw tightens.
“You told me about your mother,” I continue, my voice steady despite the way my chest aches. “And that you’re scared I’ll end up the way she did.”