She couldn’t say it. Not now. Not like this, like a bargaining chip.
Derek raked his hands through his hair, but she could see the fight draining from him. “I keep my private life private for a reason. I need my artists to respect me, to know that they’ve put their careers in the hands of someone who can behave like a professional. And the more people that know about this, the more likely it is that something gets said in front of Annie. Look at what she wished for. She’s already too invested. This is the best I’ve got right now. Can’t we figure it out as we go?”
“I’ve spent my whole life figuring it out as I go, and it’s never landed me where I want to be. I don’t want to be the boss’ dirty secret, and I never want to be the reason Annie gets hurt. And I can't wake up in a few months, when it’s too late, and find out I’ve been both.”
Chapter 18
“We lookedeverywherebut we never found any gold on the beach, and we never found the ghost.” Annie shoveled another bite of plain buttered pasta into her mouth. It was the first time she’d paused to take a breath in the last twenty minutes.
After landing in Boston and saying a strained goodbye to Jo—strained for Derek, since she would hardly make eye contact with him, though she had no trouble hugging Annie and promising to send his daughter a care package from her friend’s bakery—Derek had taken Annie home to Chelsea’s townhouse in the Boston suburbs. His ex-wife took one look at him and announced he should stay for dinner. He must have looked worse than he thought.
“Annie, sweetheart, there’s no such thing as ghosts,” Chelsea said, sliding the basket of garlic bread across the table with a pointed glance in Derek’s direction.
But Derek didn’t want garlic bread—though he appreciated Chelsea’s concern. He didn’t want anything.Except Jo.
“There could be. You don’t know. Even Giddy said the ghost might be real. But it definitely wasn’t in the ice cream shop or the library oranywherewe looked.” Annie drained her glass of milk in one long gulp. Someone watching her would have thought he hadn’t been feeding her for the last few days.
“Well, if Giddy said it, it must be true,” Chelsea said.
“Can I go play with Duchess now? I want to tell her all about California.”
“Alright, but wash your hands first.”
Annie jumped up from the table and dashed down the hall to her bedroom where her giant fluffball of a cat was likely sleeping on her pillow. Derek watched her go, but he could feel Chelsea’s eyes on him. “Just say it.”
“What happened with the nanny?”
Derek turned back to the table, picking at the garlic bread. “Nothing. It was a temporary hire.”
Chelsea’s lips pressed into a flat line. “That’s not what I meant, and you know it.”
Derek sighed. “What do you want me to say, sugar?”
“I want to know why you bothered hiring an overnight nanny if our daughter was going to spend half her nights with Kat.”Shit.“I want to know why Annie is seeking out wishing wells to make wishes about you and the nanny living happily ever after if this woman was just a temporary hire.”
He scraped his hand over his face. “It didn’t work out. Not the nannying part—she was an excellent nanny.”
Chelsea leaned back in her chair, studying him in a way that only someone who had known him for years could. “From what I hear, she was pretty great at a lot of things. Including making you happy.” His eyes darted to hers. “Annie’s seven. She’s not blind. And, for the record, Kat seems to share her opinion.”
“I’m sorry. I tried to keep it away from Annie. I know our rules about not introducing people to her unless it’s serious.”
“Is that why you think I brought this up?” Chelsea sighed and shook her head as though he’d somehow disappointed her. Again. When was he going to stop disappointing the women in his life? “That rule isn’t meant to keep you from finding happiness.”
“Protecting Annie’s happiness is more important.”
“You think she’s happy when you aren’t?” Derek glanced down the hall towards Annie’s room, the sound of her chatter floating towards them. “She worries about you, Derek. We both do.”
“I’m fine.”
“What happened with the nanny?”
“I don’t know!” He sprang out of his chair, needing to move, to walk off some of this frustration, even if all he could do was pace in his ex-wife's dining room. “I offered her a job on the tour. I asked her to come with us. I—”
“Did you tell her you love her?” He grunted and continued his pacing. “Derek. Did you tell her?”
“It’s only been a few days. You can’t fall in love in a few days.”
“Some people do.”