“Thanks for these.” She whispers as she walks over and sits down next to me.
“Any time, Babydoll.” I can’t stop the pet name as it comes out of my mouth. Her eyes are large as she looks back up to me and the sadness behind her eyes shows through. “Ella, what’s going on?”
Sighing, she looks back up at me and stops. “Axe, please. I don’t want to talk about it.” The words are whispers, and I can hear the pain in her voice behind them as she pulls her knees up to her chest, making herself as small as possible.
“Okay, just know if you need anything. I’ll always be here for you.”
“I know, thank you.” She lets out a small smile and I feel like I can breathe again.
“Alright,” I slowly stand up and look at her. Smiling down, still feeling highly conflicted about looking at her. She looks so small, so vulnerable, yet I can’t help myself from being attracted to her and feeling the pull from her. “Goodnight, Ella.” It’s nearly a whisper as I turn and leave the room.
“Axe.” It stops me as my hand touches the doorknob. “Will you stay?”
Maybe all of this was just a part of her bigger game plan. Play up the hurt and innocent so that she can get me in here. Wear me down, she knows, as well as I do, that it won’t take a lot of wearing down.
I may try to be a decent man, but I’m still a man and I only have so much willpower.
As soon as I turn around, I know that isn’t the case at all. In fact, I can see in her eyes just how scared she is, only I’m not sure what she’s afraid of. “Uh, yeah.” I can’t say‘no’to her as the water threatens to stream from her eyes.
Walking back towards the bed, I move to the side that’s far from the door, where the bed conceals the floor. “Toss me a pillow.” I tell her, and I grab the blanket that Roxy had folded and placed on the foot of the bed. She hands the pillow to me as she sends me a questioning look until I toss it onto the floor.
“I didn’t mean you had to sleep on the floor.” A small smirk forms on her face. My entire being is focused on her with the small smile, feeling like maybe I have done something right in this life.
“I know.” I nod back to her, moving across the room and flipping off the lights before moving back over to the spot on the floor. Not at all excited to be sleeping on the floor cause it’s going to be a bitch trying to get off of it in the morning, but I don’t trust myself in the bed with her overnight and if Oz opens the door to check on her when he gets to his room. I will be dead.
Pulling the shirt above my head, but leaving my jeans on, even if I will be uncomfortable as fuck. I’m not ready to have to explain some things to her. In the darkness, the scars will be concealed, but other things, well, there’s no hiding other things.
The sobs wake me up in the middle of the night. The silence coming from downstairs slightly surprises me, glancing at my watch. It’s only 4 am.
“El?” I call out to her, but she doesn’t respond. “Shit,” I mumble to myself as I attempt to push myself up off of the floor, only slightly slipping, and reach up to the bed. “El,” I call out to her again as I move across it and gently nudge her awake.
She nearly knocks me fucking out with the force that she jolts up, eyes wide open, staring at me. I expect her to say something, but nothing comes. Instead, she grabs a hold of me and grips tightly, latching her arms around my body and holding onto me, as if I’m the only thing that’s saving her.
“You were crying.” I whisper to her.
“Oh,” she mumbles, pulling out of my grasp.
“Are you sweating?” I ask her, but she only looks away
“No,” she finally whispers out.
“Don’t lie to me.” My voice sounds stern, but she knows I would do nothing to hurt her.
“Fine,” she whispers again, “yes, I’m sweating, and I was probably crying. I’ve been having a lot of nightmares recently.” I look at her for a few more moments until she slightly lowers her head. “Please don’t ask why.” Her voice is barely audible.
“Okay.” I shrug my shoulders. “As long as you promise me that when you’re ready… Hopefully soon, you'll talk to someone. It doesn’t have to be me. Just… someone.”
“Okay,” she agrees, which in this moment is enough for me. Nodding my head, I reach over, picking up my shirt off of the nightstand and hand it to her. “What—”
Cutting her off, I smirk. “You can’t sleep in that after you sweated through it. Duh.” She smirks, and I swear I feel like my fucking heart swells. I just want to take away her pain.
She sits up on the edge of the bed and I have to force myself to look away, even if her back is to me when she slips the shirt off over her head.
Moving on the bed, to lay back down on the floor, I hear her voice as it sounds so small, “Axe, please.” I glance back at her and even in the darkness I can see her big brown eyes looking up at me. I can see by the look in her eyes that she’s scared. That she isn’t trying to convince me of anything except that she needs to feel safe.
Sighing, I move back over to the head of the bed as I smile over at her. “Come here.” I nod over to her as she moves to me and snuggles into my chest. It’s the closest I’ve ever been to Ella. “It’s okay.” I whisper to her as I feel her relax in my arms. “You’re safe, babydoll. I wouldn’t ever let anyone hurt you.”
“I know, Axe. Thank you.” She relaxes even further into my chest. It doesn’t take her long before she’s fast asleep against my chest. I can feel her breath as it moves along my chest, and I can’t help but think about the change in her since the last time that I saw her. She just looks so broken today.