Here was the conversation she wanted, and yet she was afraid of it as well. “What did you decide? That youmustmarry me?” She heard bitterness in her voice.
He reached out and ran his fingers along the length of her arm. Where he touched, her skintightened with expectation. “I thought that you may be right. Perhaps I shouldn’t live my life afraid of a curse.” He raised his gaze to meet hers.
Her heart leaped at his words. “I wasn’t mocking you with my questions of Reverend Wells,” she said. “I would never do that, Neal.”I love you.
“Don’t care deeply for me, Thea,” he said, as if she’d spoken aloud. “Protect yourself.”
“Does that mean you will walk out on me again?” she asked, a knot forming in her throat. “Or is this curse—?”
She stopped, struck by a sudden realization. “Wait,” she said before adding thoughtfully, “the curse no longer matters. Not to me.” She met his eye, her mind so clear that it startled her. “All I want to do is love you.”
There, she’d said it.
A second ago, such a declaration had been impossible to make, and yet here she’d spoken straight from her heart. No armor; just love.
Her words hovered in the air between them. She could picture them, bright and shining and true. A joy, a freedom she’d not known existed, filled her.
“I love you,” she repeated. “I think I’ve always loved you, even when I didn’t realize I loved you. You caution me against feeling deeply for you, butit is too late, Neal. I believe you are the finest man of my acquaintance. While others are wrapped in their petty concerns of status and self-importance, you have tried to do what is right.”
“I’m as petty as the next man.”
She shook her head, almost overcome with this insight, this depth, thishonestyof her feelings. “No, you truly are special, and if it is a curse that has caused you to think of your legacy, well, so be it. All I want to do is love you. I want a life with you and with my sons. I am all for building a fortress around us to keep away evil spirits and witches and trolls, whatever threatens us. But the one thing I don’t want to avoid is love. I tried that, Neal. For the last five years of my life, I’ve run from love, but not any longer. I love you.”
“Thea—,” he started as if to defend himselfonce again,but she stopped his words by placing her fingers over his lips.
“It’s too late for me to protect myself. Can’t you hear the conviction in my voice? I love you, Neal, in a way I could never feel for any other. And it is all right if you wish to pretend you cannot love, but I know differently. No matter how hard you try to put distance between us, I will always be here for you, Neal. I will not turn away and I will not run. I don’t believe in your curse, but Idobelieve inyou. Whatever happens, whatever may come our way, I shall not leave your side.”
“You do not know what you say, Thea.”
“I know exactly what I’m saying, and I speak without fear and without doubt. You can’t protect me from love, Neal, because I already love you. I started loving you all those summers ago. But now we are older. Wiser. And I still love you with that pure innocence and trust I gave you years ago. I didn’t even see it back then, but this afternoon, in this moment, I realized how much you mean to me—and this time, you’d best never leave me. Do you understand, Neal? I go where you go.”
“I don’t deserve you, Thea. In time, you may come to hate this marriage.”
“No, I won’t ever. And don’t fear making me a widow again, Neal. One thing I’ve learned is that we have only the here and now. It is all that matters. The rest is speculation and doubt and fear. Butthisday, this minute is real.”
She then took his face in both hands and kissed him with all the generosity in her spirit.
Like flame to kindling, he responded, his arms coming around her. What was between them was more than mere sex, and it had been from those days long ago.
He needed her.
She needed him.
Neal suddenly swept her up in his arms. He carried her out the door, up the stairs, and across the threshold of his bedroom.
There, in the privacy of his chambers, they began undressing each other.
The night before, they had been so eager that there had been no time for exploration. Neal made up for it now. He kissed her neck, her shoulder, her collarbone—all the while unlacing her dress and pulling it down over her shoulders.
Roses falling from her hair, Thea tilted her head back with a soft, happy sigh.
She tugged at the waist of his breeches, pulling his shirt out and then sliding her hands under his jacket. She adored the feel of his body. He was all hard planes and muscle. Her fingers danced along his rib cage before she slid his jacket off, letting it fall to the floor. She kissed his neck, nuzzling him and delighting in the texture of his skin and the scrappiness of his whiskers. She tickled him with the tip of her tongue and he laughed, the sound startling her enough to pull back.
“What is it?” he said.
He was so handsome in the evening light. So strong and masculine. “The last time I heard you laugh was years ago.”
“I want to change that, Thea. Riding yesterday, I realized I’ve given up too much of life.”