“Hello.”
“Hi.”
Ji-Su couldn’t help but be happy to see him. They’d only been separated for less than a day. And maybe it had been silly of him to run off. But he was glad that Raul had come for him, even pushing himself to arrive while the last of the sun’s rays were still in the sky.
“May I come in?”
Ji-Su nodded and stepped back to allow Raul to enter, then closed and relocked the door behind him. “I guess I avoided another awkward conversation,” he said with a somewhat embarrassed laugh.
Raul smiled.
“Only delayed it. And that’s okay. Are you up to talking now?”
Ji-Su nodded again.
“Let’s sit down then.”
The room was nice enough to have a pair of wingback chairs separated by a small end table. They both sat down.
“Before I say anything, tell me why you didn’t want me to join you in the shower. I know you don’t have to invite me into your shower if you don’t want to. But it felt like you were purposely shutting me out. Like you were rejecting me. And I can’t...” He swallowed, his throat tight with emotion. “I can’t handle that again.” Ji-Su anxiously flexed his fingers like he did when he was about to start the most challenging part of a video game and waited for Raul’s answer.
“Ji-Su. Look at me.”
Ji-Su took a deep breath before he slowly looked up and met Raul’s gaze.
“I am sorry for making you feel rejected. That was not my intention. I was so worried that I might physically hurt you that my only thought was to leave as fast as I could. I should have taken the time to explain myself and I’m sorry I didn’t.”
“Explain it to me now. Why are you treating me like I can’t handle sex with you when we both know that’s not the case? Is it because of your vampire strength?”
“No. I don’t even have to think not to use my vampire strength with you. That would never happen.”
“Then what is it?”
Raul sighed and raked a hand through his hair before he answered.
“I do worry that I will hurt you physically. Because sometimes I like rough sex. And I find myself wanting that with you. I want...” He trailed off into silence. Looking down at his hands, he repeated Ji-Su’s earlier action and flexed his fingers. “But I can’t.”
“Why not?”
Raul looked at him with a confused frown on his brow, like he didn’t understand Ji-Su’s question.
“Because when I look at you, I see a pure, sweet thing.” He reached out for Ji-Su’s hand, holding it between both of his own as if he were cradling a fallen dove. “You’re small and delicate and your skin is so soft.” He raised Ji-Su’s hands to his lips to kiss the tips of his fingers. “I want to protect you. Even from myself.”
“I don’t need protecting from you, Raul.”
“You do.”
Ji-Su shook his head. “Idon’t,” he stressed. He stood up from his chair. “I know that I look like this. But maybe my outside doesn’t match my inside. Maybe I’m like those Beny Locochas candies.”
Raul tilted his head back to look up at him in question.
“What do you mean?”
“I mean I’m sweet on the outside and spicy on the inside.” He blushed. “Okay, maybe that was corny. But it’s true! I want you to—.” He faltered and had to push past his embarrassment to continue. If he wanted it, he had to ask for it. “I want you to fuck me hard. And I trust you not to hurt me.”
Raul suddenly stood, towering over him, crowding into his space.
“Is that right?”