Sure, he doesn’t owe me an explanation, but the shift in his demeanor mixed with my bubbling anger toward the girl has me all sorts of twisted inside. Collins takes a deep breath and sits down on a flat rock by the water, patting the empty space beside him, and I sit, too.
“We’re just friends. We’ve known each other?—”
“Since you were kids, I gathered that.” I can’t help my snarky attitude. Why I feel suddenly so possessive over Collins, I have no idea, but I also don’t really give a shit either.
He presses his lips together into a fine line and looks toward me, slightly taken off guard.
“Sorry, I’m not trying to be a bitch, I just really didn’t like her.”
Now, he’s smiling. “Yeah, she’s a little insufferable at times. I’m sure she’s drunk, so it’s no surprise. She gets extra feisty when alcohol is involved.” He opens his mouth to say something else but then quickly changes his mind and closes it.
“What were you going to say?”
“I was just going to say that apparently alcohol makes you feisty, too. I’ve never seen you cop an attitude.” His gapped front teeth shine from the moonlight and he bites his lower lip. God, he has a great mouth. Honestly, I’ve never seen one more perfect. I sort of want to bite that lip, too.
“There’s a lot you don’t know about me, Collins.”
“Is that right? Well, we’re going to have to rectify that now. Aren’t we, beautiful?” He leans a cheek onto his fist, propped up on his knees. “Tell me something I don’t know about you.”
“Oh, no, no. You’re not getting out of this that easily. Tell me more about blondie in the bikini, and maybe I’ll tell you something.”
He chuckles and leans back on his hands, looking toward the sky.
“Steph and I, as you know, go way back. But I swear, we’ve always just been friends. We’re the same age, and had most of the same classes in school. Her brother is the same age as my brothers and we all used to hang out a lot. Senior year, we were all at a party together. One thing led to another, and Steph and I ended up in a back bedroom by ourselves. We only kissed but at one point things looked like they were going to start heading in a different direction. Steph kind of unloaded on me, telling me about how she had all these feelings for me. She wanted her first time to be with me. And she wanted it to be right there in that bedroom that night.”
Collins leans forward again, rubbing a hand down his face.
“Long story short, we didn’t have sex. I liked her and everything…but just not enough to go that far.”
“So, you’re telling me that you turned down a perfectly beautiful girl in the peak of your prime? I didn’t know guys like that actually exist. Well, except for maybe the ones written by women in all those novels my Nan reads.”
He shrugs his shoulders and gives me the most adorably flirty grin.
“I guess I’m the exception.”
I laugh at that and knock him with my shoulder.
“Truth is, Johnnie, I’ve always considered sex a pretty damn intimate thing. Not just something to toss around in a casual way. Yeah, sure, plenty of people have casual sex, sex with no-strings attached, that sort of thing. But it just means more than that to me. I almost feel like giving myself to someone in that way is like giving a piece of myself to them. A part of my soul. Ihaven’t come across anyone that feels worthy. Not yet anyway.” He eyes me while keeping his head forward like he’s afraid of my reaction.
“I’m honestly speechless, Collins. So, you’re a virgin?”
He closes his eyes and remains still before he begins speaking again.
“Yep, I am. And Steph hasn’t taken me turning her down too well. Ever since that night she’s been super weird around me. Flaunting other guys in front of me whenever she can. Like she wants to see me get jealous. But truthfully, she’s just not my type. Too materialistic, too vain.”
“What exactly is your type?” I hold my breath, not able to believe I just let those words fly out of my mouth.
He turns his whole body toward me and gently strokes a finger down the side of my cheek.
“Here, lately, I’ve been insanely attracted to this girl with light brown hair that looks blonde in the right light, with beautiful blue eyes that look a whole lot like they see my future. She lives with her saucy grandmother, in a little single-wide next to mine, and ever since I first laid eyes on her, nothing has been the same. And I like it that way.”
CHAPTER 13
collins
THEN
Since my confessionto Johnnie earlier, putting my fast-progressing feelings for her out there, there’s been a shift between us. Johnnie has, I guess you could say, let her guard down. She’s been letting loose, and we’ve been having fun. Downing beers, getting in on a game of beer pong, dancing.