Looking into my eyes for a brief second, she flashes them back toward her feet, chewing on her thumb.
“I know you said you don’t hate me, but why?” Her eyes back on mine once again, she isn’t finished speaking, I can tell. She removes the thumb from her lips and sighs. “Don’t you want to know what happened, why I left?”
I huff a laugh, the kind that definitely has no humor behind it. “Of course I want that. More than any fucking thing. I may not know you now, but I knew you then. And I know you must have had a good reason. All I can ask is that you tell me when you’re ready. Please.”
She presses her middle fingers to the corners of her eyes, looks at the floor, giving me a tight-lipped smile. “Thank you. You’re right. I will. I can’t yet, but I’ll get there.”
I nod, because anything else would break me right now.
“Well, first things first. All Nan’s stuff has to be taken care of before I can even think about heading back. I have to finalize all of the arrangements. I’m going to go to the funeral home when I wrap things up here.”
“How about waiting until I get done at work, and I’ll take you over there. You really shouldn’t be doing things like that alone.”
“Well, Bea was supposed to be going with me, but I told her to go ahead and hang out with Campbell. They’ve been talking nonstop since she got to town. You know those two never could resist each other.”
“She mentioned something like that, yeah.”
“If you’re sure about going, that would be amazing, actually. That place gives me the creeps. Company would be lovely.”
“I mean, it’s a funeral home, theyarecreepy.”
She smiles—my weakness. That fucking smile is going to get me in trouble.
“Okay, I’ll be over to get you later.”
Johnnie closes her eyes, taking in a deep breath. When they reopen, I swear tears are coating those blue orbs, amplifying the already vibrant hue.
“Why are you being nice to me?”
“I have no reason not to be nice to the girl who declared a part of my heart as her own a long time ago. She still has that piece of it, no matter what’s happened.”
A tear spills over and streams down her cheek.
As I start to head out the door, my eyes catch on something sitting on the table. The envelope I gave her. The one Nan insisted I give to her when I saw her again.
And it’s unopened.
CHAPTER 15
johnnie
THEN
Opening my eyes,the sun shining in is far too bright for my pounding head. I squint my eyes and notice a gift from God, apparently. A bottle of blue Gatorade, my saving grace. After downing half of it, remnants of last night rush in. It’s almost like I can physically feel each memory as it comes back. Every image, a jolt to my aching brain. I’m never drinking again. Pretty sure I can smell the beer seeping from my pores, too.
Disgusting.
On closer inspection of my nightstand, I see a pink sticky note flapping in the breeze that’s blowing in through a sliver of the window Collins must have left open when he slipped out.
You’re cute when you’re drunk.
Even cuter when you snore.
- CC
I spend my entire shower smiling at the echoes of last night that keep flashing through my mind. A combination of pure bliss laced with embarrassment.
The hot water along with Tylenol I downed does wonders to bring me back to life, though. Hopefully I can face Nan without her suspecting anything. Tossing my hair up into a messy bun and pulling an oversized T-shirt on, it’s time to go out and face the music.