“I meant...” As they headed inside, he wanted to kick his own ass. Now was not the time to delve into the past.
She flipped on a few lights as he relocked the door.
“Meant what?” She waited, then realization dawned in her eyes. “Or it’s something you don’t want to talk about?” Hand to her forehead, she apologized again. “I’m sorry. I keep pushing when I don’t mean to.”
When she started to turn away, Kam caught her hand. Here, where they’d gotten carried away earlier that day, seemed like as good a place as any to bare his soul. “It’s not that. My past... It’s an ugly memory.”
“I’m sorry.” As if to shield him, she slipped her arms around him. “I knew that, or at least I’ve assumed, since Addie adopted you.”
“My parents died, but it wasn’t a big loss to anyone.” Though it had still crushed him. With his nose against her hair, breathing in her gentle fragrance, he confessed, “I used to think of paybacks. Like one day I’d be big enough to beat the shit out of my dad, or when my mom picked up a belt, I’d turn it on her.” Her arms tightened, and though she didn’t make a sound, he felt her distress.
He needed to shut up, but the words kept coming.
“Neighbors were forever spying on my dysfunctional family. I’d stick out my tongue or flip them the bird.”
“Trying to prove you didn’t care.”
Her quiet whisper felt like an understanding stroke, making it impossible for him to deny. “Something like that.”
Often he got a harsh punishment from his mother for doing it. Not that it stopped him.
He’d gotten tough because he’d had no choice. It was either fight back or break, because his folks had enjoyed a wicked game that always put him in the middle. His dad would smack him around, saying he had to toughen up, which doubled his mother’s determination to beat out all resemblance to his father.
He’d found following his father’s advice easier. If he was going to get hit, he might as well swing back. Didn’t do him much good, but it felt better than just taking it.
All along, he’d told himself that one day he’d run away, that he’d go where no one would find him: A place where he could make his own rules.
A place where whathewanted mattered.
“So many times, I’d wished my parents dead—and then one day, they were.” And he’d been so fucking lost he’d wished for death, too. “Sometimes they’d lock me in my room.”
Glory squeezed him tighter.
“For my own good, they’d say.” Many times, Kam wonderedwhy they’d even kept him around. “Occasionally, they’d be gone so long I’d have to crawl out the window to use the bathroom.”
“Where did they go?”
“Dad liked to hang out with his friends, usually at a bar. Mom would go to my grandmother’s house.” Continued anger and hurt put a cruel smile on his mouth. “The night they died, I thought they’d forgotten all about me and I’d considered just running away. I figured I could get pretty far before they ever returned. I was hungry, pissed off... and a little afraid.”Afraid to stay—and afraid to go.“I went out the window again and a neighbor saw me. He tried to talk to me, but I told him to fuck off.”
“Kam.”
Prim Glory. If she stuck around long enough, she’d hear worse from him. He’d been cursing since he was five years old—encouraged by dad, beaten by his mother. Then again, he could usually curb it for Addie, so he should probably curb it for Glory, too. “He called the police, concerned because he hadn’t seen any signs of life from my parents for a day and a half. The next thing I knew, cops were talking to me through my window, then they broke down the door, and I was being hauled off to someplace new.”
Sympathy showed in her furrowed brows and the trembling of her lips. “Your parents?”
“Bizarre tale, really.” For the first time, talking about it wasn’t devastating. Other than telling Addie and Tanner once, skimmed-over versions at best, he’d refused to talk about it. With Glory, he felt like a man, not that overwhelmed boy with no control of his life. Stepping back, he lifted Glory’s face and pressed a kiss to her mouth. “You pack some powerful juju, lady.”
A sad smile teased her lips. “What do you mean?”
Powerful, and she didn’t even know it. “You make things easier.”
Complimented by that idea, her eyes brightened. “I do?” Then she teased, “Or are you just hoping to get busy against the wall again?”
“A guy can always hope, right?” Bending his knees, he looked into her eyes. “But hey, I know you have preferences, so no pressure from me.”
“Come on.” She took his hand and led him toward the kitchen. “You’re leaving me in suspense, you know.”
“About sex? Rest assured, it’s guaranteed.”