As far as role models for manhood, Lance was the worst and had taught Sky hownotto behave as a man. But he had also taught Sky that everyone was worthy of love and thathewas fine, just the way he was. Lance had understood and accepted Sky and had given him a safe place to land every time his “real” parents had rejected him.
Sky lowered, dizzy and ears ringing as he kissed Lance’s forehead. “Love you.” He backed away on weak legs and ignored the way the room tilted as he turned, keeping his eyes locked on the door. His skin prickled as Sky began to sweat but he kept his head up and stumbled along, picking up speed as his stomach churned and the room grew dark and closed in around him.
“It’s okay. I’ve got you,” a warm, deep voice said softly.
“Mase?”
Sky was wrapped in a tight, secure embrace and rushed out of the room. They turned down a short hallway and Mason used his shoulder to shove another door open. He ushered Sky into the small room, stroking his hair and back.
“I’m so, so sorry.” Mason shushed soothingly while he rocked them. “So, so sorry about Lance. And everything else, Sky.”
“He’s gone!” Sky let go and cried into Mason’s shoulder. “He’s gone and I—! I… I don’t know!”
“Shhhh! It’s okay. I don’t know if we’ll ever make sense of him or this family but don’t try to process it all right now,” Mason advised with a sad sigh. “Just think about all the reasonsyou love him. Lord knows you’re probably the only one here he genuinely cared about, other than himself,” he added, then grunted when Sky delivered a weak punch to his ribs.
“I loved him because he didn’t pretend that he was high and mighty like everyone else. He knew he was a scoundrel but he never hid it or told other people how to live their lives.”
“That is true,” Mason conceded. “The thing I liked best about Lance was how much he loved you and how proud he was when you got into Columbia and when you graduated. He told everyone you were going to be a famous writer and the biggest thing to come out of Roseview.”
Sky nodded, unable to speak, he was so choked-up with pain and grief. He cried for several minutes, soaking the shoulder of Mason’s coat but he didn’t seem to mind. His arms stayed firm around Sky and his touch remained tender as he kneaded and scrubbed Sky’s scalp. Eventually, Sky’s sobs settled into sniffling hiccups.
“Thanks. I feel a lot better,” he said and finally raised his head and took stock of their surroundings.
The room was small and the lights were turned low. An artificial stained glass window was mounted on the wall across from them and glowed softly, casting pastel shapes onto the other walls and Mason’s right cheek and ear. They were seated on a love seat and there were two armchairs and a coffee table bearing a box of Kleenex. The rest of the room was bare but Sky found it peaceful and soothing to his overwhelmed emotions and senses.
“Is this the Reflection Room?”
There was a faint chuckle from Mason as he looked around. “I was worried you might have a rough time so I snooped around for someplace quiet I could hide you. It’s not as bad as a supply closet, but it could use more art or some color on the walls. Maybe a few candles…” He held up a finger, then reached under his seat and produced a bottle of water. “Here. You’ve been traveling all day and it was really intense for you in there. You won’t know a moment of peace if you faint in front of Nadine or your sister. And you don’t want Adele to think you’re trying to upstage her,” Mason warned with a gentle nudge.
“Thanks.” Sky accepted the bottle and opened it and took a long drink. He was thirstier than he had realized and finished most of the bottle in three large gulps.
“Good thing I have two.” Mason ducked to pull out another. “I thought you’d be in a hurry and too sad to eat anything today so I also brought these.” He handed Sky another bottle of water and two strawberry Jell-O cups.
“Oh… Wow,” Sky mouthed, overcome again as he was bombarded by more memories. Strawberry Jell-O had been his comfort snack since he was a child and theonlything he’d eat when he was sick or scared. “You remembered?” he asked in a broken whisper but Mason didn’t seem to notice, he was retrieving a spoon from inside his coat.
“Yup. Here.” He traded it for one of the cups so he could open it for Sky. “Did you eat anything today?” he asked, taking back the spoon and digging out a scoop. He held it out to Sky. “Come on. Open up.”
Too shaken to do anything else, Sky craned his neck and obediently opened his mouth. Some of his wettest dreams had started just like this... Breathing was impossible as Mason lifted the spoon to his lips but Sky’s soul quieted as the Jell-O dissolved on his tongue and he swallowed. The sugar and the familiar flavor did their magic and Sky laughed as he took the cup and spoon from Mason and sank against the back of the seat.
“It’s probably safer if I do this for myself.” He ate a few more spoonfuls and offered Mason a nod. “Thanks.For this and for getting me out of there before I crashed. You’re right: Mom would be unbearable and Nadine would spend the next twenty-four hours babying me when I’d rather use that time with Nana. Mom says she—” The words wouldn’t come out, they had clogged his throat again so he shook his head and scraped out what was left of the cup.
Nana Sutton had never been a warm or affectionate grandmother. She didn’t do crafts or play games with him and Sarina when they were kids, but she had made the Sutton House their second home and had allowed them to have the run of the place. Rarely short of an opinion but stingy with compliments, Nana could be intimidating and difficult. She often lamented that her son, Stewart, was such a shallow idiot and frequently implied that Adele was a manipulative narcissist. She was right, but didn’t hold any of that against Sarina and Sky, thankfully.
“She has slowed down,” Mason confirmed. “Nana’s a stubborn old girl, though, and she’s pretty obsessed with Sam. She might hold out a little longer for him.”
“Do you think so?” That was the best news Sky had heard in days. Maybe weeks or months. He’d been really worried about Nana lately and regretted not being there more over the last few years. “Work has been nonstop. Publishing is exhausting and getting around the city leaves me pretty frazzled.”
“Why stay? You don’t have to work in Manhattan and live in Brooklyn.”
Sky nodded. “I do if I ever want to finish this book and get it published. I’m busting my ass and living in a shoebox, but I’m learning from the best editors and agents in the business. People would kill for this kind of insight and the networking I do on a daily basis.”
“That’s great.” Mason smiled as he opened the other cup and handed it to Sky. “So, you’re happy?”
“Sure.” Sky shrugged. “Is anybody happy at this point in their career? I’m extremely privileged because I went to the right schools and I can afford my crappy apartment in Brooklyn without the meager salary they pay me.”
“You could afford something in Manhattan, if you wanted to be closer to work. You’ve inherited a lot of money.”
Sky’s face pinched at the thought. “My shoebox is all I need and Kayla’s more than my roommate, she’s my lesbian soulmate, and I like the neighborhood we live in. The people there are nice and normal, for the most part. I don’t want to pay that kind of money to live near a bunch of rich assholes, just so my commute is easier. Besides, do you know how weird it would be for an assistant editor to live in Midtown?”