Words wouldn’t come, so Ozrik was likely left with the impression that I wasn’t ready, when that wasn’t it at all. I was more than ready to take that step. I wanted to. Desperately.
But the time for action had passed, and I was left with regret.
It was after eleven. By silent agreement, we walked back to the house. No lights shone from the windows, so I assumed Dad had gone to bed. He wasn’t the type to spy, so when Ozrik took my hand and drew me close, I let him.
“I guess I’ll see you tomorrow in Tulsa.”
“I guess.”
“Don’t sound so jaded. It will be fun.”
“If you say so.”
He glanced at the dark house, squinting at the windows.
“He’s asleep,” I said, reading his mind.
“Does that mean…” Ozrik moved closer and nudged his nose with mine.
“Zap,” I whispered.
He chuckled. “Zap. Every time.”
Then he kissed me.
Each one came easier. I’d found the rhythm of Ozrik and was able to keep up better than earlier. The kiss was brief and relatively tame compared to the ones we’d shared by the stream, but it was enough to leave me longing for more. Enough that I regretted it when he pulled away.
We came apart with matching smiles.
He clung to my hand like he didn’t want to let go. “I like kissing you.”
“I like kissing you, too.”
“Maybe we can do more of that sometime.”
“Maybe.”
We didn’t make specific plans, so I couldn’t help wondering if he meant it.
“Good night, Gale.”
“Good night.”
22
Ozrik
Vern drove with me to Tulsa. I didn’t miss the querying glances he tossed in my direction during long silences when I got lost in my head. The three-and-a-half-hour drive gave me too much time to think. My kiss-bruised lips were a neon sign that I’d been busy. Vern noticed everything.
I’d been quiet all morning, replaying the previous night with Gale to excess. I hadn’t had a make-out session like that since high school, and I didn’t care that it hadn’t ended in an orgasm. Something about Gale was different.
Vern might have been my best friend with whom I often shared about my hookups, but I hadn’t said a word, and he kept throwing me suspicious glances.
I didn’t trust him to keep his mouth shut, and I would not be responsible for outing Gale. I might have been a lot of things, but I respected a person’s right to come out when they were ready. Vern, being straight, didn’t always get it.
What I couldn’t wrap my head around was the unsettling attraction I felt toward the shy farm boy with the nervous eyes and gentle manner. No matter how many times I tried to convince myself that my pursuit of Gale was solely for the privilege of taking his virginity so I could brag, the lie wasn’t convincing even me. I was drawn to him long before I knew a thing about him.
Besides, who would I brag to? Although taking someone’s v-card might have been a feat I was proud of in high school, the novelty wore off after graduation. Adopting a fuck ’em and forget ’em motto had become my preferred method of hooking up, but all my rules were getting tossed out the window with Gale Windrow.