Be Somebody [Thousand Foot Krutch]
I Climb [Thousand Foot Krutch]
I missed the storm,but that doesn’t mean I didn’t have to clean up after it. Dad busted Mum’s leg and is now sleeping as if he weren’t the problem, cause, and why the home looks like a dumpster hit it.
Entering the bathroom, I grab the numbing cream and painkillers and hand them to Mum. She’s resting on the lounge, curled up with a blanket over her.
When I entered my home after Conner dropped me off, she was in my bed, with her leg over the sheets, and blood seeping into them. I wrapped a bandage around her leg, removed her from my room, tossed the sheets in the washing machine, and went back into the living room to place a blanket over her, for she was trembling from shock.
She falls asleep within half an hour of me giving her the painkillers and numbing cream. As she rests, I wash the dishes, pick up the beer bottles littering the ground, and wash the floor, removing droplets of blood and pasta sauce stains.
Afterwards, I fill up a cup of water and place it on the coffee table with more painkillers. She will wake in a few hours in pain again. I wish I could do more for her, but my thoughts drift to the electricity bill. Trouble awaits us both if the TV goes out. She will understand.
In my room, I place fresh sheets on my bed, and by the time I clean my room, Dad is awake. I stop what I’m doing until I hear the bathroom door close. Sagging my shoulders, I go to my desk and rewrite my English assignment. It’s hard to do, considering my mind returns to when Conner and I kissed.
My face burns at the thought of his lips finding mine again in the car when we said goodbye. It was brief. A flutter of a kiss, but it was enough to send butterflies fluttering inside my stomach.
“So, you’re home?” I jump at the sound of Dad’s voice. He leans against the doorframe, eyes narrowing. When I merely nod, he slaps the frame with his hand and says, “You can put your door back on. I’m sick of your fucking snoring.”
“Okay…Thank you.”
With a grunt, he says, “When you’re finished with the door, get me some more beer.” He drops a twenty-dollar note on the ground and walks away.
I leave my seat, grab the money and say, “I’ll get it now.”
“Why?” he says as he turns to me. “Are you afraid that if you don’t get me my beer first, I’ll hit yah or something?”
“No,” I lie.
He sneers. “You’re a terrible liar, Noya. Always have been.” Dad raises his hand, and as I recoil, he laughs darkly and walks away. “Thought so.”
I bite my lip to keep the tears from spilling.
Not yet. Not when he is looking.
He wantedme to put my door back on for a reason. Still, the walls are thin, and the sound carries as I stare at my still fan.
“Stay fucking still,” Dad moans.
I roll over to my nightstand, grab my headphones, plug them in, and turn the volume up on “I Climb” by Thousand Foot Krutch until my eardrums burst.
I want it to numb out the sounds of everything and anything.
I want to return to this morning, and when he stood before me with that majestic smile.
I want to be there again, where he carefully held me like porcelain.
My mind rests on repeat, back where the beds don’t creak, nor do the bodies break. I lay there with him, and everything within this home fades away.
There’sno sound the following morning. My parents’ door was closed, and the home remained clean.
I leave earlier than usual, not wanting to see her face once she leaves the room. I’m not ignorant. I know the hell she must have been in last night, but while she stands still, frozen in time, I’m moving forward and finding my way out.
I’m saving myself.
My stomach knots together as Conner pulls up at the bus stop. I bite my bottom lip, grab my bag, and shuffle into his car. As I glance at him momentarily, heat blushes across my cheeks. I’m not as confident as yesterday, and so I look away quickly.
“Morning,” he says, and I hear the hint of amusement in his voice.