“Vesper!”
He turned to see Briar’s molten eyes, a perfect match to her cheeks, and her anger spouting from every pore. It bubbled over and spilled into the air.
“You’re going to listen to me. Alright?”
Her tone stunned him into silence. Briar had always been loud, a large, bold presence, but this—
She’d never spoken to him likethisbefore. He’d pushed her too far.
Vesper nodded, his eyes wide.
“Cal and I have been covering for you but you need to figure all this out. The Council is coming.” She huffed a hot breath. “We received a letter today while you were out doing Deimos only knows what.”
The blood drained from Vesper’s face and his knees grew weak.
The Council consisted of beings who were onceKennabut had taken an oath and sacrificed their mortal shells to become the Instruments of the Gods. The unnatural power they emitted was utterly terrifying and merely being in the same room as the Council left a taste on the back of one’s tongue. Though they ruled as an unseen entity, their reputation kept order amongst the masses.
He recalled how the colour would drain from Destonne's stupid, smug face after each meeting. At the time, he’d never cared enough to attend and only ever glimpsed the backs of their blood-red cloaks. But now that he was being forced into the same situation—
He knew it was coming but …fuck. This had to be bad.
Briar drummed her nails against the doorframe as her shadows circled her like a rogue hurricane. “Tell me what’s going on or so help me, I’ll beat it out of you.”
His gaze remained fixed on the ground as he slumped onto the end of his bed. When he finally looked up, the feeling building in his chest the past few weeks reached capacity and burst its seams. He blinked away the tears, his voice hoarse. “They’re all gone, Bri. Izzy, Father, Emmery.”
“I know but acting this way—” She shook her head. “It’s not you.”
Vesper drew a trembling breath. “What if it is?”
Briar made her way to the bed and draped her shadows over them like a heavy blanket. “I’ve known you my whole life, Vesper. And I’veneverknown you to be this way.”
The words stuck in his throat but he said them anyway. “What if beneath it all, beneath that shiny, happy exterior … What if I’mrotten?”
“You’re not rotten.” Her response came too quickly. Without thought.
“Broken then,” he offered.
“Much less has broken stronger men.” Her eyes softened. “You can’t hold all this inside. You need to talk to me or Cal or Marlys. And you can’t keep drinking your problems away. It won’t work.”
A beat passed and they both stared at each other, unsure how to proceed. He swiped at the tears clouding his vision, mortified he’d almost let them fall.
Fuck, hehatedcrying. It made him think of all the times his father turned away whenever he did as a boy.Come to me when you have words for your feelings,his father would say, but some emotions couldn’t be reduced to words or even voiced. He’d always find himself in Marlys’s arms after.
Vesper stalked to the window, unclasped the lock, and threw open the panes to suck fresh air into his lungs. He braced his forearms on the windowsill and leaned his throbbing head in his hands. “I’ve seen her,” he said, voice low.
Briar’s brows pulled together. “Who?”
“Izzy,” he whispered into the breeze. He glanced at her over his shoulder. “I’ve seen her in my dreams.”
Her sympathetic look stemmed a hollow ache inside him.
“No, it’s not like that. I’ve talked to her. Seen her. She—” His voice cracked. “When I—” He broke off again, “Fuck.” His head sank into his hands and he took several deep breaths before he finally got the words out. “When I …died,” the word wheezed out of him, “I woke up in this black abyss. It was so cold and quiet and dark. But Iz was there. She begged me to stay. To save her, but”—he swallowed around the lump in his throat—“when I woke, when Emmery brought me back … Iabandonedher.”
Briar was quiet. Her chest rose and fell slowly. “How do you know it was real? That it was her?”
“I’ve seen her since. Sometimes I dream about her and I canfeelher. I can touch her. Hold her. I’ve never had dreams like that before.” He stared at the wall past her. “I need to save her. Something isn’t right.” He released a trembling breath. “And I fucking left her.Again.”
When Emmery had brought him back to life, he’d felt himself ripped away from that space between, his connection faded like dust in the wind. Then Vesper had woken in the castle dungeons and when he stared into Emmery’s joyous face and knew he’d left Izzy to rot in thatplace—