Fionn glanced at the door. “Whereissister dearest?”
“She’s on her way.” Emmery fidgeted with the comforter to keep her hands busy. The air shifted between them and now burned with tension.
He shuffled down in the bed and laid with his elbow bent and the back of his head cradled in his hand. “I’m sure you have a barrage of questions for me.”
More than he could imagine. As Emmery stretched out next to him, she studied his side profile, the soft curve of his jaw, and those long dark eyelashes fringed over his almond eyes. Her gaze followed the serpent tattoo. “What if I’m afraid of the answers?”
“Don’t be,” he said and closed his eyes. “It’s only me. There are years between us, but nothing else has changed. I’m still me and you’re still you.”
Emmery nodded as if she understood, but doubt swelled in her chest. She supposed she’d start with the most difficult one. Get it out of the way, rip it off like a sodden bandage. “So what was between us—were we … friends?”
“I can’t believe that’s your first question.” Fionn’s brows bunched and he sputtered a disbelieving sound. “We were friends before you woke up across the gate. And we are now, too, in case you didn’t know.” A shit-eating grin swept over his face. “I heard you reading to me, Em. You had some solid choices, but that pirate adventure wasawful.”
Relief washed over her and the knot slowly unfurled inside her. But if he heard her reading, did that mean he heard her conversation with Destonne last night? And with Briar? There were still too many questions and pieces missing. “Why didn’t you tell me you knew me before? And that you’reKennatoo?” Emmery gnawed on her lip. “You knew what I was. What I went through—”
“I—” He started and nibbled on his thumbnail. “Honestly, I don’t know. At first it was hard to even talk to you. You didn’t recognize me and remembered nothing, so it was like talking to a ghost. And then so much time passed that I didn’t know when to tell you. Besides, I don't have—” He shrugged, but it was heavy, like the thought was a ball and chain.
“You’re Forgotten,” Emmery said cautiously. “But what’s your magic?”
“The burden of shield.” He stared at the ceiling, his jaw set in a hard line.
Emmery nudged him with her elbow. “Can I see? I’ll show you mine if you show me yours.” In an attempt to lighten the conversation, she playfully flicked a thread of gold fire and toyed with it between her fingers before she dashed it away.
Fionn rolled his eyes. “There’s not much to see. But—” He held his hand between them and a strange bronze shimmer the size of a dinner plate appeared. It was translucent, but as Emmery pressed her hand against it the opacity remained, like touching a wall.
“That’s—Fionn, that’s damnbrilliant.” Emmery pushed against the resistance again, but it didn’t budge. “Why didn’t you show me before? We could have had so much fun with this.”
“It’s nothing,” he said again. He wiped the shield from existence. “I was embarrassed, I guess.”
“Embarrassed?” Emmery snorted. “Says the man who is one of the kindest and most loving people I know. Also the man who used to declare random ‘no pants days’ and strutted around in his underwear.”
“Stop, I’m blushing. And no pants days live on,” he joked. He gnawed on his fingernail again. “You’re likely wondering why I didn’t take you with me and why I was there in the first place. I’ve been dreading that one.”
Emmery narrowed her eyes at him. “And?”
“You see, the thing is…” He chewed harder, like he would devour his whole finger if it got him out of the conversation. “I can’t tell youwhyI was there. As for why I didn’t take you with me, I wasn’t sure if it was safe for you here. Things had gone so poorly after you were hurt, Em. We were on the brink of war and there were people looking for you and—” He hissed a disgruntledsound. “I can’t say anymore. Look, I want to. I really want to tell you, but I can’t. It’s part of the pactum I made. I’m sorry.”
Emmery groaned. “You’ve got to bekiddingme.”
“Afraid not.” A sheepish grin. “Wish I could.”
“Can you tell me who gave you that book?” Emmery asked. She gestured toThe Nameless Bookand her hand. “And this ring? Where did you get them? I need to find the man who gave you these. It’s important, Fi. The world depends on it important.”
Fionn frowned like he was contemplating it and opened his mouth to speak, but not a whisper of sound came. He closed it, tried again, and his corneas flashed black as Vesper’s had after she’d brought him back from death.Compulsion. Fionn squeezed his eyes shut and when he opened them again, they had returned to his familiar warm bronze. “Sorry, Em. I can’t.”
She wanted to scream. Or hit something. Possibly set this whole room ablaze. Instead, her head fell into her hands. The weight of it all stood on her shoulders until she was ready to crumple to the ground.
Fionn pressed a hand to her back and rubbed circles into it, much like Destonne had the night she was sick. It was something Fionn had done for her each time the grief of losing Mae had been too much and she fell apart. Fionn always put her back together.
She leaned into him. “I leave tomorrow,” she said into his shirt.
“I heard,” he replied, still continuing those circles. “Dez told me earlier.”
“It’s weird you’re friends with him.”
“And you aren’t?”
Emmery snorted. “Absolutely not.”