Obviously everyone is accepting of Chandler’s poly relationship, and my family is extremely accepting of everyone. When Nash came out as gay, no one even really reacted. It didn’t change anything, it never could. We all love each other unconditionally.
But I don’t know how she would react knowing it was Asher, or how she would feel aboutmebeing in a poly relationship. I stay quiet because this isn’t even a relationship at this point anyway. They know I like them both. We’re having fun, but that’s all we’ve established, and I’m not going to bring it up to my mom when I don’t even know what I’m doing.
“What else have you been working on?” my mom asks, pulling me from my thoughts easily.
I smile. “A couple things. It’s a little different than my usual.”
“Good, I want to hear it. I love changing it up.”
I know she does. She’s dabbled in different genres herself. I wouldn’t say this is a different genre per say; I’m pop where my mom was always more rock sounding. I like the edge she has, but never thought I could do the same. Until now. I needed areason to, some motivation and inspiration and I think I’ve found it.
We get lost in the music I play for her; she helps adjust things I’m unsure about but never oversteps and it’s one of my favorite things about writing with my mom. She knows what she’s doing, but she trusts me as well. She would never suggest something that would completely change my vision. She would never take over a song herself, she offers assistance as needed, and usually only when I ask.
At one point in our afternoon together I almost ask if she’s had a stalker before. She’s never mentioned it. She’s warned me about the dark sides to the industry, and protected me from everything she could. Predatory management and labels. Contracts that could end my career before it even started. She’s always looked out for me, and I’ve known that everything in the spotlight isn’t all glitz and glamor like Hollywood wants you to think. But she’s never mentioned having a stalker or anything like that.
If that’s even what’s happening to me because nothing has happened since the box, and I’m probably just overreacting. I’m sure I am. My mind is just on overdrive as it usually is and I’m blowing up nothing into something for no reason.
“I think you have the start of a great new album, Rae,” my mom praises and I beam at her. She wouldn’t just say that. If she says it, she really means it. “You staying for dinner?”
Right on cue my stomach growls, and she hears it.
“I’ll take that as a yes.” She gets up from the piano bench and I start to follow her, but hang back to glance at my phone to see Asher texted me.
I bite back a smile, not wanting her to see my reaction and question me.
Asher
Had to go through PT thinking of how fucking good you looked riding Grayson’s cock. Need to have you on mine. Soon.
I smirk. Grayson is gone for another two days and as tempting as it is to see Asher, the next time I see him I want it to be the three of us again. I want more of what happened in the studio.
But that’s the thing, I wantmore.
I want them both to touch me at the same time. I want to push all my limits. Because I think that’s who I am. I’m a risk taker. And I like being pushed to the edge, jumping off with both feet and trusting that I won’t drown.
Rae
You will. Two days when Gray is back. I want you both.
I lock my phone, following my mom to the kitchen, hoping the blush in my cheeks fades when I think about what’s to come.
This may be crazy, but it’s fun. Probably more than I’ve ever had, and I’ve never felt more alive. I like this. I want more of this. I don’t want the world to see me just as some good girl.
And they won’t.
Not anymore.
CHAPTER 28
Grayson
Ididn’t tell Rae I’m back tonight. She thought I’m coming back in the morning, and I didn’t correct her. I wanted to surprise her. Even though I’m exhausted and my bed is calling my name, hers is calling me more. I knock on the door, anticipation running through me.
The door swings open, but I’m not met with red hair and blue eyes. Instead, there’s a six-foot-two MMA fighter standing there with a self-satisfied smirk on his face.
“What the fuck are you doing?” I rear back and he just continues to look smug.
“What does it look like?”