Page 76 of Every Almost

Why is everyone that matters leaving me?

Be the Captain.

Both Elena and Jere now, the pair of them, from different kinds of distance, were telling her the same thing. Elena from wherever PERS had scattered her, Jere from a blue planet where a woman had pulled him out of the stars and into a life he couldn't refuse.

You have a soul match too. I know there is someone out there, waiting for you...

Reyna set the transmission down on the desk. She pressed her palms flat against the surface and stood there, breathing slowly while the ship hummed around her, and somewhere on the other side of the galaxy, the last person who called her "Rey" began to build a life she could never be part of.

Bigger than the universe.

Their phrase. Jere's ridiculous, self-appointed, unilaterally declared phrase that Elena had pretended didn't make sense and Reyna had pretended to tolerate, the phrase that all three of them had carried like a secret handshake. They had created their own shorthand for the love they'd built, where it all started at a table that nobody else could see why mattered.

Reyna left the office and began walking, not really knowing where she wanted to go. Eventually, she was standing in front of Borran's kitchen, deciding to go in.

Borran was there and watched her walk in. Reyna had never been shy to admit that Borran seemed to have special powers. And tonight was no different.

Borran sighed heavily behind the counter, pulled out a setting for one place - one plate, one drink - and set it down on the counter in front of him.

This counter used to hold three settings, with the kitchen filled with raucous laughter and sentimental confessions. But then, Elena disappeared, and the settings went down to two.

Now, it only held one. Borran patted the counter next to the setting. So Reyna walked over, climbed onto the stool, and sat.Borran set a plate of food down in front of her, and as she looked at the food, she just didn't have it in her to eat it. Not now.

Borran didn't leave her. He stood at the counter, working dough once again with his six-fingered hands, and stayed with her. And though no words were exchanged, it made it possible for Reyna to stave off the loneliness she knew was creeping in.

Time passed, and eventually Reyna ate. When someone who cared about you put food in front of you, you made every effort to eat it. She and Borran didn't speak, but he stood by her until she finished her food, then cleared her plate away and refilled her drink. It was his way of telling her to stay as long as she needed, and that he'd be here as long as it took.

Nobody asks for family, Rey. That's the whole point.

Jere's words, his voice, from another kitchen so far away and a night so long ago. When he put his hand on hers and told her she was stuck with him and Elena. And even in that moment, when she was startled by the words and comforted at the same time, she had believed him. She believed it because he said it, and in all her life, believing Jere was the easiest thing she had ever done.

And he had been right.

But now, he was gone. Elena was gone. And the weight of her never seeing her family again hit her so hard she couldn't breathe.

? 1977 / CYCLE 487 | EMBERKIND CV-0417, SECTOR LYRA ?

Almost an entire year later, the Coalition processed Elena's disappearance as officially lost. Reyna was uncomfortable withthe particular efficiency of this organization as it reduced her grief to paperwork.

There were forms for a formal transfer of command and assessments for operational continuity to ensure the Emberkind had all positions filled appropriately to resume full missions. Reyna had an official onboard with Admiral Vondra where she asked three questions. First was about crew readiness, which Reyna answered with the appropriate data. The second was about mission bandwidth, where Reyna answered with projections and timelines.

But the third caught Reyna off guard, one she was not prepared to answer in any way.

"And are you prepared to assume permanent command, Captain Solas?"

Captain Solas. This was the first time anyone in an official position had called her that. Sure, the crew had been calling her Captain for some time now, but out of respect and authority. Hearing it from Admiral Vondra made it real. Real in a way that made them settle on her shoulders and feel the weight of the title.

"Yes, Admiral," Reyna said.

Vondra paused, and it was a long one for a Lithyn. Her geode eyes held Reyna's through the viewscreen, and as she studied her, Reyna saw the moment where, whatever she saw, it was enough of what she had been looking for, and she accepted the answer.

"Approved. The Emberkind is yours, Captain."

When the transmission ended, Reyna sat quietly in the office. She realized it was officially her office now. She had yet to change anything in it, but the truth was, she did not intend to. She wanted to keep Elena's star maps on the walls, the datapads of knowledge stacked where she could find them. She wouldeven keep some of Elena's clutter, strictly for the reason to keep her presence alive, even if she wasn't here.

She looked over to the other side of the desk, seeing Elena's captain's chair still there, still untouched. Elena had made big decisions in that chair, but small ones, too. It had lived a life of a captain along side her, absorbing her stress, holding her up when she was weary, or providing a place to find quiet, just for herself.

Reyna stood and walked over to the chair. She looked down on it, almost afraid to touch it for fear of what it could hold for her as she assumed her new role.